Ahab the Arab

"Ahab the A-rab" was a song written by Ray Stevens. It probably had nothing to do with Ahab, king of Israel. But I always think of that whenever I read Ahab's story. 1 Kings 20 and 21 has a couple of stories about AtA that illustrate his schizophrenic character. I guess Ray had his Ahab living a double life.

Chapter 20 shows his unstable character in full. Ben-hadad was the King of Aram. Aram was in present day Syria. Ben came against Ahab with 32 crony kings. Later in the chapters the battle scene characterizes Israel as "two little flocks of goats, but the Arameans filled the country."

Ben-hadad sent a message to Ahab,
    3 ‘Your silver and your gold are mine; your most beautiful wives and children are also mine.'

Ahab's manly and kingly response was:
    "It is according to your word, my lord, O king; I am yours, and all that I have."

Most beautiful wives? Does that include Jezebel? Ben-hadad wanted to make sure that it did.
    5 "Thus says Ben-hadad, ‘Surely, I sent to you saying, "You shall give me your silver and your gold and your wives and your children," 6 but about this time tomorrow I will send my servants to you, and they will search your house and the houses of your servants; and whatever is desirable in your eyes, they will take in their hand and carry away.'"

Talk about an insult. Not only is Ben-hadad taking everything, he is inspecting the premises to make sure that Ahab had not withheld anything. This was too much even for the groveling Ahab and he rebelled. So the two kings face off.

Ben-hadad was the master of intimidation:
    10 Ben-hadad sent to him and said, "May the gods do so to me and more also, if the dust of Samaria will suffice for handfuls for all the people who follow me."

He threatened to wipe Ahab and all of his kingdom, Samaria, off the face of the earth. So Ahab and his 7000 men face the horde of the 33 kings. But Ahab's retort to Ben-hadad is classic.
    "Tell him, ‘Let not him who girds on his armor boast like him who takes it off.'"

When I was in high school, our little school (about 100 students) was financially challenged. We played a much larger school in basketball at least one time a year. Imperial had the most impressive sweat suits that they wore during warmups. We would stand in awe when these flashy suits poured out of the locker room and whisked around the court in a choreographed warmup ritual. They looked like the Harlem Globetrotters. We wore some worn warmup jerseys.
   
One year, our coach realized that we were intimidated and encouraged us. "They put those warmup pants on one leg at a time, just was we do. You are not playing their warmups. There will be five guys out there, just like we have."

Ahab's response was even classier, but it encompassed the same idea. Taking off your warmups is not the time to brag about your victory. And Ahab wiped out the army–with the Lord's help. The next chapter recounts the second attempt by Ben-hadad and the story lists at least 127,000 men who were killed by Israel and the Lord.

And Ben became a servant of Ahab and Israel. A steel backbone did not energize Ahad's first response, but it surely did fire the second and Ahab's victory over Aram and 32 other kings. Incidentally, we usually beat Imperial too. Just so you know. And if we didn't they knew they had been in a fight.

The follow up to the story of Ahab is not so attractive. He allowed Ben-hadad to escape with his life when God had told him to kill him. In return, Ahab would give his life in exchange for Ben-hadad's.

So he returned to Samaria in a funk. He probably lived in Jezreel, either as an retreat, like Camp David, or a second castle. He decided to cheer himself up by building a vegetable garden. (Huh?) Anyway he approached Naboth and offered to trade a nice vineyard for the one next to his house. Naboth refused, as he was complying with God's command not to sell the family inheritance.

And Ahab reacted like the mighty warrior that he was.. 21:4
    So Ahab came into his house sullen and vexed because of the word which Naboth the Jezreelite had spoken to him...And he lay down on his bed and turned away his face and ate no food.

How mature. Jezebel, his wife found out and asked what was the matter. (Whiney voice) "Naboth will not give me his vineyard. I even offered him money or a better one. I wanted that vineyard. Waaa waaa waaa. (Ed note. Artistic license.)

    21:7 "Do you now reign over Israel? Arise, eat bread, and let your heart be joyful; I will give you the vineyard of Naboth the Jezreelite."

"Pull up your big boy pants, go get something to eat, and be happy." (League's Reversed Version) And with this, we retire to contemplate what we saw. I guess we should call Ahab's behavior Waffling Ahab. Not sure if Ray Stevens ever thought of this, but Schizo Ahab is as interesting as his Arab.

Is there a personal lesson here? Perhaps the best one would be "Guard your heart."
    Proverbs 4:23 Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life.

Ahab was not careful in his words, actions, and wants. He had one flash of brilliance when he trusted the Lord, but sadly that was not his normal "manner of life." Being wise in our thoughts and words will pay off in the long run. Don't be two faced.